In the spirit of Father’s Day, let’s celebrate and encourage the fathers and father figures who serve their families, children and community. These men can be powerful examples of respect, kindness and love to children coming into care. Sadly, many of these children come from homes where neglect and violence was experienced on a regular basis. Instead of a foundation built on a father’s love, there was neglect, fear or harshness. As a result, foster dads, granddads and uncles may be the first positive male role model a child experiences. Below are some suggestions for recognizing the important role of these men in helping  children normalize healthy patterns of love and stability in their lives.

Be a positive role model: Children will be watching you, looking to compare and contrast their new relationships with former ones. This provides an opportunity to help them learn how a loving and caring male lives and serves others. Setting positive examples in relationships, communication, managing work, implementing respectful discipline and following through on commitments are a few examples of useful life skills to model for children.

​This time of year, families are usually registering for summer camps and checking community activity calendars  with great excitement, looking forward to the Summer months ahead. This year, the impact of COVID-19 means  Summer will look different.  As families continue making the necessary adjustments there are still many opportunities  to creatively engage kids in ways that bring  joy and fun. Below are some suggestions that will  keep kids busy, create happy memories  and build strong connections, all of which are vital in developing healthy, resilient families.

Porch drop offs:  Kids love surprise gifts!  Porch drop offs  can be a great way to bring the fun and a change of pace. Create a bag of items like coloring sheets or puzzle books,  sensory objects, water toys, summer treats and an age-appropriate craft project. Consider porch swapping puzzles, games and toys between households as you feel comfortable.

Cupcake Wars: Have one or more families set up a place where kids can get messy and host a virtual baking party. Drop off  vanilla frosting, decorating supplies and cupcake batter. Have  each kid use two ingredients from the pantry to create personalized  flavors. (For younger kids,  pre-make different flavors of cupcakes and frosting.) Let kids be as creative as their hearts’ desire with fondant, candy toppings, melted chocolate, cookies, and piping bags full of fun colors. Designate a judge to determine the winner of the decorating competition, have kids share about their personalized flavors,  and enjoy the yummy results together.

During Support Team Training, you may recall learning about the many traumas foster children experience and the resulting impact of grief and loss. As children go through the process of resolving their experiences, it is not uncommon for a new traumatic event like the fallout of COVID-19 to re-start the cycle. Foster parents work tremendously hard to create a sense of stability and safety, which for many kids was upended overnight by this pandemic. In a time where children are being asked to shoulder many changes and uncertainties in their daily routine, psychological and emotional distress may resurface. Below is a refresher on each stage of grief, how this global crisis may be affecting a child impacted by foster care, and some helpful tips on how to walk alongside a foster child navigating new losses.

Denial: It can be difficult to help children understand what is going during this pandemic. Children may feel that this viral threat does not affect them and they can still have visits with family, play dates with friends, and continue going to school. Since things changed so dramatically over spring break, children may have thought of the first weeks as an extended vacation and expected to quickly return to normal.