The Reach of God's Grace

When we started our time as a foster family, we were confident about what the experience would look like. We had four children, ages 7-11, and that was plenty for us. When we got phone calls from placement workers, one of the questions we would ask was, “Does this case seem likely to go to termination?” And if the answer was yes, our answer was no. We were not trying to adopt; we were working with families in crisis to reunify.
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We all know the pithy phrases about what happens when we make plans. A couple of years into our foster care experience, we received a phone call about a newborn. I should say, my wife received a phone call about a newborn. It seemed like there was about a 50/50 chance that the placement desk would call me versus my wife, but on this one, they called my wife. We had already discussed the age ranges we were open to (elementary to middle school), and those ranges did not include newborns. We were done with diapers, bottles, cribs, and middle-of-the-night feedings. But my wife called me after talking to the placement desk and told me she had a feeling about this one.
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Baby A came to us at about 10 days old. I am not a mystical person by any stretch, but I remember feeling something powerful, a deep well of love that I didn’t realize I had in me when I first held her. It’s one of my most vivid memories. But we were still committed to reunification, and my wife especially worked tirelessly to cheer on the birth mom, while loving this little baby. After eleven months, we got balloons, took the birth mom out to brunch to celebrate, and handed over baby A. We all cried the whole way home, and for days after. The grief was heavy, but we did our best to hold on to the joy of a family reunited successfully.
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Our grief and joy were short-lived, as a month later, baby A came back into care and re-joined our family. A few short months after that, termination was finalized, and we were added to the list of families adopting on National Adoption Day in November. We celebrated this incredible addition to our family and mourned the brokenness of a birth mom who lost her child.

Often, the adoption story ends there. But my wife believed that no one was out of the reach of God’s grace and offered love and acceptance to this birth mom who needed it so badly. She went through recovery and found stable housing. We grew closer as friends, and she joined our church. Our daughter would worship Jesus, sitting next to her “first mom,” and attend childrens' classes with her half-sister and brother. Now, this amazing woman–who battled homelessness and addiction and won–works for a local nonprofit that shelters the unhoused in the South Denver area. She offers her lived experience to the organization as they craft policy and procedures. And she and her family are regular fixtures in our home (as I write this, I know they are coming over for dinner tonight).
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It’s so easy to be myopic about our expectations of what God might do in us and through us. We set out our plans and limit our imaginations. But every once in a while, we are reminded that God can do exceedingly abundantly above all we can ask or think (Ephesians 3:20). And we are reminded that no one is out of the reach of God’s grace.

By Mark Gomez, Front Range Church and Community Engagement Manager