Trauma-Informed Holiday Season

If a child is struggling during the holidays, know that the root cause may lie deep in their past. You can’t predict or prevent all trauma triggers, but you can practice compassion, empathy and understanding.  Building resilience takes time and patience, along with trial and error. Keep these tips in mind during the holiday season:

• Don't just assume they're having a blast. Holiday traditions are personal, and the child in your life might not have experienced them before or may not feel joyful because of past trauma.

 

• Ask if they're okay and really listen. If you think something's up, check in. They might not be able to fully explain their feelings, but knowing they aren't alone helps build positive relationships.

 

• Be empathetic. Acknowledge that their feelings make total sense given what they've been through. This helps them feel understood and respected.

 

• Ease them into new stuff. New things can be scary. Start small, and don't push them if they resist or are reluctant to join in. Listen to their behavior, not just their words. They need to feel safe and empowered knowing they have a choice—it's a big part of healing trauma.

 

• Make new traditions together. If old holiday memories are painful, try something brand new! Ask them what one thing they'd like to do for each major holiday. Letting them help plan makes them feel more empowered.

 

• Watch for sensory overload. Bright lights, loud noises, and even physical touch from family/friends can trigger trauma. Be aware of how they might react. Create an exit plan in advance.
  

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• Stick to routines when possible. Kids do well with consistent routines, so try to schedule some downtime between all the holiday hustle and bustle.

By Marilyn Robinson, Director of Family Connection