A Day in a Foster Family's Home

This is a fictionalized composite from the experiences of multiple foster families.

Derrek & Marie are currently fostering Diego, a 6-year old boy. This is an example of a day in their home.

It’s 10:00am and Diego’s Caseworker and Guardian Ad Litem will arrive any minute.  There’s fresh coffee in the pot, and Support Team Member, Floyd, has arrived to watch Diego during the meeting. The doorbell rings, and for the next hour Derrek, Marie and the two guests sit around the table talking about Diego’s special needs, how to best parent and support him, as well as the possibility of Diego returning home to his mother, who’s working hard to reunify with her son.

After the Caseworker & Guardian Ad Litem leave, it’s time for a visitation with Diego’s mother, Erika, at a nearby McDonalds. Derrek thanks Floyd for watching Diego during the meeting, while Marie & Diego get in the car to visit his mom, Erika.  While at McDonalds, Diego & his mom catch up talking about school, friends and his upcoming birthday. Finally, Diego spends the last half hour of the visit in the play center as Marie and Erika begin discussing how they can best prepare Diego for a  transition home.
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After McDonalds, both Marie & Diego meet with their therapists to talk through their current struggles.  Here, Diego has the ability to work through questions like “Why can’t I go home today?” and “When is my Mom going to be better?” At the same time, Marie has the opportunity to talk to someone about the difficulties of their situation, and opens up about her mixed emotions toward the idea of Diego returning home since he’s truly become part of the family. On the way home, Diego comments about how much he enjoys seeing his mom.

Walking in the door, Marie is thankful to see that Support Team Member, Betsy, had delivered the weekly meal. What a blessing to be relieved of cooking duties for the evening. While the lasagna heats, Derek, Marie and Diego sit down together on the carpet and play “Go Fish.”

As often happens after visiting his mom, Diego has a melt down right before bedtime. Struggling to stay calm, Derrek calmly but firmly guides Diego through the nightly routine, rubbing his back until Diego finally falls asleep.

Supporting A Family in the Day-to-Day

• Offer your time. Parents know how your time can best serve their family.
• Offer your eyes. Set aside time to watch the kids while parents have meetings, errands to run or need an afternoon to rest.
• Offer your ears. Take opportunities to listen and empathize as parents discuss some of the challenges they’re facing.
• Offer your dinner.  Delivering a cooked meal gives families the opportunity to build attachment and spend extra time together.