Celebrating Fathers and Father Figures

In the spirit of Father’s Day, let’s celebrate and encourage the fathers and father figures who serve their families, children and community. These men can be powerful examples of respect, kindness and love to children coming into care. Sadly, many of these children come from homes where neglect and violence was experienced on a regular basis. Instead of a foundation built on a father’s love, there was neglect, fear or harshness. As a result, foster dads, granddads and uncles may be the first positive male role model a child experiences. Below are some suggestions for recognizing the important role of these men in helping  children normalize healthy patterns of love and stability in their lives.

Be a positive role model: Children will be watching you, looking to compare and contrast their new relationships with former ones. This provides an opportunity to help them learn how a loving and caring male lives and serves others. Setting positive examples in relationships, communication, managing work, implementing respectful discipline and following through on commitments are a few examples of useful life skills to model for children.

'Partner with the family: Being a foster dad and role model is a tremendous task and requires a lot of time, energy and emotional capacity. In order for a foster dad to remain healthy while providing the high level of care the children in his home need, it is important to ensure he takes regular breaks. Specifically, foster dads need consistent, uninterrupted time with their spouse and by themselves. Offer respite opportunities for the foster father to step away and recharge by completing some of his to-do’s around the house or offering to take the children to the park for a few hours.

Develop relationships with foster and adoptive children: As foster children learn to develop trust with their foster dad, building relationships with other  healthy male mentors and role models will further develop their  sense of safety, as well as help them develop positive goals for the future. Educate yourself in trauma care and the interests of the child. Use that information to be intentional about creating a relationship with the foster child. It will be a blessing to you both and create another valuable resource for the child to access in a healthy community.

​Celebrate fatherhood: Be quick to encourage and praise a foster dad's efforts in building healthy relationships with the children in his home. A quick text, a card, a phone call or some words of encouragement shared over a sub sandwich can help him see the eternal impact his life is having in the lives of his children and community.